Witch in the Bedroom – Stacey Demarco

Witch in the Bedroom: Proven Sensual Magic
Stacey Demarco
Llewellyn, 2006
288 pages

Note: This review was written in 2006 for newWitch magazine and appeared in a 2007 issue.


Witch in the Bedroom
is written for witches and non-witches alike on ways to use magic for everything from finding a good partner to getting pregnant. This means that there’s a lot of 101 material that most pagan readers will be familiar with; however, it’s presented in a format that any newbie can understand and doesn’t overwhelm the rest of the material.

Some of the most valuable information is the relationship advice Demarco gives. Rather than just sending us off with a few love spells, she explains how to undo bad relationship patterns, appreciate ourselves, and find a healthy relationship without codependence.

The rituals are another strong point of this book. While aimed at getting a healthy relationship with someone else, they also foster healthy relationships with ourselves and support sex-positive outlooks on life whether you’re currently single or taken. Each one is original without resorting to formulaic templates that just switch around correspondences.

One of the down sides is that the blame for bad sexual attitudes is all too often laid at the feet of Christianity. The entire book has a general feel of “Christians ruined sex, which the pagans had been enjoying with no problem, and now it’s up to witches to make sex good again!” Additionally, she doesn’t say where she got her historical material from, and rather than a bibliography, there’s a scant “Recommended Resources” list. She talks about what the “ancient witches” did, without backing up her research—shoddy scholarship.

Also, the book is overwhelmingly heterosexual. This isn’t bad in and of itself, but if you’re not looking for a relationship with an opposite sex partner or if you’re sick of the God = Active and Goddess = Passive dichotomy, you may find yourself skimming over a lot of this book. Additionally, if you’re childfree by choice, the 58 pages on how to get pregnant and have a healthy baby will be useless.

Still, the book has achieved its intended purpose—to offer a magical guide to healthy sexual and romantic relationships to both pagans and nonpagans. It’s a good, practical work with a lot of useful material.

Four pawprints out of five.

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1 Comment

  1. Stacey said,

    July 2, 2008 at 10:40 pm

    Hi

    I just came across this reveiw of my book.

    Whilst Im delighted I got 4 pawprints out of 5 and really grateful you reviewed my book, I’m very disappointed that you interpreted my book as heterosexually biased. I use the word ‘partner’ as a unisex term all the way through my book. In the IVF section and the rituals featured, I specifically refer to same sex couples.As 25% of my fertility clients in Australia are in fact same sex couples I would never bias my work in that way.

    Oh and by the way, whilst I would love to include the long list of historical references, sometimes in the publishing process they get omitted…format restrictions and all that. Happy to share if you would like them!

    Warmly
    Stacey Demarco


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